I drink therefore I am.
W. C. Fields
(January 29, 1880 - December 25, 1946)
I'm looking for loopholes. (Said when caught reading the Bible.)
It was a woman who drove me to drink -- and, you know, I never even thanked her.
I'm free of all prejudices. I hate everyone equally.
There are only two real ways to get ahead today -- sell liquor or drink it.
This action is likely to be the playbook for creationism for the next several years,
(October 24, 1945 - )
People need loving the most when they deserve it the least
Always blame it on the guy who doesn't speak English